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Jordan Jafferjee passes I-7, controller has meltdown
Despite having the trickiest surname on the roster, Jordan blitzed through the ratings at record pace. Even Bryan Wollenberg, real world and VATSIM ZLA controller was so taken aback by Jafferjee's progress that he tried to assign an approach into Santa Catalina that didn't exist. Hey BW, traffic 6 o'clock, less than a mile, opposite direction descending
uncontrollably out of 5000, Your Career.
"I dunno what happened," said a clearly shaken, and mentally diminished Wollenberg, "one minute he was our baby, puttering around the pattern doing his V-1..." Wollenberg pauses to wipe a tear, "and then all of a sudden, he's calling for an approach into Santa Catalina." Controllers gather to help steady Bryan, "I guess I just forgot my _years_ of training and just told him to join the localizer."
The mood quickly becomes sullen, though, as FAA officials approach to remove BW from his post. Struggling now, he says, "It could've happened to anyone! You know they really SHOULD have a localizer at Santa Catalina anyway. How many frickin' times to people go missed because of indefinite ceilings at 200ft?? It's a disaster waiting to happen!!"
While it's obviously sad to see a senior controller completely lose his bottle, it really is for the best. If we hadn't caught this error, how many other pilots might BW have tried to join an imaginary localizer at a faraway island?
In fact, we wonder if he hasn't done this before? If you've got a story to tell, call us a 1-800-BW-SENTME-TO-A-LOCALIZER-AND-WHEN-I-GOT-THERE-#-ALL-I-FOUND-WAS-A-STUPID-VOR (if your phone is blessed with a comma, use that instead of the #, although if you're actually TRYING to call the number, we should probably talk and you should avoid operating heavy machinery for the day.)
Jordan coped with the ordeal remarkably well, "I'm going to give BW a
break, largely because we have equally ridiculous last names. Those years on the playground were rough, lemme tell ya."
Well, Jordan Jaffer.... Jubberje.....Flibberdab... good ol' JORDAN, we salute your steely resolve and hope to see you our skies.
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