Mike Cassel passes I-11
Congratulations to ZLA's Mike "KWANG5.CMA" Cassel for passing the I-11, initially under the control of Keith Smith, but ultimately with the up and coming Kevin Meyers. The shift change couldn't come fast enough for Keith, who was not willing to endure what would likely be the butchering of another SID by Mr Cassel.
It's always been known that Mike Cassel was at the center of his own, personal universe. Evidently, though, his center recently suffered some sort of collapse, resulting in the formation of a large, aeronautical black hole, sucking in far off VOR's, often in other ARTCC's, turning them into published transitions on all-powerful, all-encompassing SIDs. Unable to withstand the unyielding draw, CMA became the first VOR to fall prey to Mike's powerful hole.
It's only a matter of time before FIM, SMO and maybe even LAX all follow suit, becoming victims of a force that historically was only known to a few hastily-promoted S1's and someone named "Effie," who could not be reached for comment, on account of her having some sort of a puncture.
Mike has brazenly flaunted the new SIDs, filing KWANG5.CMA with gay abandon for some time now. Hopefully, someone will come along and plug his hole forever.
[Editor note: New pilots need not fear receiving such high praise upon completion of their rating. Lambasting like this is reserved for ZLA staff members.]
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